Comments on: Georgia O'Keefe goes mixed-medium

Georgia O'Keefe goes mixed-medium

Jon_Evil — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 21:54:02 -0800

As if being rich and trashy weren't already enough work, now there's vajazzling, too. (NSFW)

By: Blazecock Pileon

Blazecock Pileon — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 21:59:08 -0800

A case of life imitating art.

By: ricochet biscuit

ricochet biscuit — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 21:59:53 -0800

A little NSFW warning goes a long way. Also, can somebody let me know when people stop using "vagina" as synonymous with "vulva" (or in this case, "general groin region"). Thanks.

By: Splunge

Splunge — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:02:37 -0800

I give up. I'm on my way Elizabeth. This is the big one... ::clutches chest:: ::Falls to ground:: ::dead::

By: bicyclefish

bicyclefish — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:03:35 -0800

I'm just going to sit here and hold my breath until the apparently arch but really desperately interested New York Times lifestyle piece appears.

By: Inspector.Gadget

Inspector.Gadget — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:05:02 -0800

I'm going to start a high-end dangly-bits-decorating salon, but when people come in I will instead take their money at gunpoint and krazy-glue their mouths shut and their hands to the backs of their heads. My aim is nothing short of the total extinction of Douchicus heyguyslookatmeus

By: Joe Beese

Joe Beese — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:06:05 -0800

With the recent stories of whales and dolphins being killers just like us, it's nice to find something that truly distinguishes us from other species.

By: desuetude

desuetude — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:07:08 -0800

Also, can somebody let me know when people stop using "vagina" as synonymous with "vulva" (or in this case, "general groin region"). Thanks. Quoted for FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND HOLY YES. I was going to bitch about people who even usually are sticklers for anatomy and accuracy who still seem to have forgotten the world "vulva" and then somehow lead into a "slippery slope" reference, but gee, I wouldn't want to be vulgar...

By: awfurby

awfurby — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:07:41 -0800

It can only be a matter of time before someone bedazzles their arsehole. I wonder if whatever profession that is called will appear on "Dirty Jobs"? That would be great tv...

By: koeselitz

koeselitz — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:10:52 -0800

Well, you've got to do something. Not like there's much going on down there. And even with the jewels, what've you got? Once it's shaven smooth, looks like just another blank patch of skin. Pajazzling – now that is something I'd like to see.

By: Ambrosia Voyeur

Ambrosia Voyeur — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:11:28 -0800

> It can only be a matter of time before someone bedazzles their arsehole. Well...

By: ORthey

ORthey — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:11:42 -0800

Also, can somebody let me know when people stop using "vagina" as synonymous with "vulva" The academic linguist in me says "that's not how language works" but the comedy linguist in me says "do you really think vulvazzling sounds better than vajazzling????"

By: Navelgazer

Navelgazer — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:12:53 -0800

"Well I was totally up for it, but then she hadn't even Bedazzled her mons! Like, WTF, right?"

By: shmegegge

shmegegge — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:13:00 -0800

Vajazzling? That sounds interesting! I wonder what it is. I bet it's adorable. *clicks link* oh fuck my shit.

By: Ambrosia Voyeur

Ambrosia Voyeur — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:15:42 -0800

If "vajazzling" gets to be a word, vajizzling does too. It's only fair. The proper assent to the proposed act of which is spoken "fashizzle vajizzle, my nizzle."

By: Abiezer

Abiezer — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:16:24 -0800

I knew if I left it untreated long enough crusty genitalia would come into fashion!

By: Inspector.Gadget

Inspector.Gadget — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:20:11 -0800

"Now the nice lady is gluing—literally gluing—the expensive crystals onto my pubis. Look at the precision with which she does this. She is a consummate craftswoman." No, I'm pretty sure a third-grader could do that with aplomb. The difference is that third graders usually have the sense to keep the glue stick off of their genitals.

By: voronoi

voronoi — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:20:30 -0800

One of those moments on MetaFilter where you're all, 'oh, please, don't let this be exactly what it appears to be.'

By: dunkadunc

dunkadunc — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:21:52 -0800

I was expecting the use of an actual Bedazzler. ow ow ow ow ow

By: idiopath

idiopath — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:23:19 -0800

Monsazzling would be a more appropriate term. There is something about people misusing the medical term - if you are going to use the colloquial meaning of vagina, you could just use one of the colloquial synonyms, it isn't like there is a shortage or something. Cuntazzling or Hoohazzling anyone? Pussynalize your twizzat!

By: AsYouKnow Bob

AsYouKnow Bob — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:24:21 -0800

Really now, if she was that bored - wouldn't it have been a lot easier for everybody if instead she just set her money on fire?

By: P.o.B.

P.o.B. — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:28:07 -0800

Okay, I'll ask. Why?

By: graventy

graventy — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:28:39 -0800

I await the inevitable Maury Povich episodes and youtube singles dedicated to your man coming home with jewels on his dick.

By: Jon_Evil

Jon_Evil — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:28:52 -0800

actually, i think the creepiest part about the whole thing is the sign on the wall of the 'completely bare' salon with what looks like a 12-year-old girl.

By: Jon_Evil

Jon_Evil — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:29:41 -0800

No, I'm pretty sure a third-grader could do that with aplomb. I think you just invented macaroni vajazzling.

By: darkstar

darkstar — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:31:03 -0800

I've been walkin' these streets so long Singin' the same old song I know every crack in these dirty sidewalks of Broadway Where hustle's the name of the game And nice guys get washed away like the snow and the rain There's been a load of compromisin' On the road to my horizon But I'm gonna be where the lights are shinin' on me Like a rhinestone cowboy Riding out on a horse in a star-spangled rodeo Like a rhinestone cowboy Getting cards and letters from people I don't even know And offers comin' over the phone

By: yeloson

yeloson — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:31:58 -0800

I guess I better save up to get the new Vajazzler Barbie (TM) and Exxxtreme Body Mod Ken, complete with Tramp Stamp glue-on tats and Lawn Litter PBR bottles.

By: jimmythefish

jimmythefish — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:33:16 -0800

Technically it's Mons Pubazzling.

By: b1tr0t

b1tr0t — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:34:43 -0800

I blame the fall of Western Civilization on this.

By: pupdog

pupdog — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:34:51 -0800

Honestly, you decided you wanted to go for the smooth approach, and then put speedbumps in. Make up your mind.

By: Damn That Television

Damn That Television — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:35:55 -0800

"I did it all for the nookie..... because DAmn theres diamons on that pussie!!! WOW L@@K at the jewel pussy, I never see one before and now this, heh im rich from pussy rubys bitchesssss!!! Bush Was Right" - Fred Durst

By: dunkadunc

dunkadunc — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:36:16 -0800

>: Exxxtreme Body Mod Ken Is he one of those crazy, kooky types who, armed with nothing but BME, scissors, and a large helping of crazy, decides to sit down in his bathtub and attach a penis to his body?

By: pupdog

pupdog — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:38:02 -0800

Is he one of those crazy, kooky types who, armed with nothing but BME, scissors, and a large helping of crazy, decides to sit down in his bathtub and attach a penis to his body? Made out of household silicone caulking no less.

By: P.o.B.

P.o.B. — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:38:06 -0800

Actually, I take back my question. It's obvious why, because she can. It's only a matter of time before skin grafted jewels and programmable tattoos are easily and widely available. There is something I do want to know. Why there?

By: drjimmy11

drjimmy11 — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:38:35 -0800

This seems fine to me.

By: Jon_Evil

Jon_Evil — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:39:37 -0800

she's a rich girl, she don't try to hide it diamonds on the front of her cooze he's a poor boy, empty as a pocket empty as a pocket and nothing to lose, sing ta-na-na (ta na-na) ta-na-na, yeah she got diamonds on the front of her cooze ta-na-na (ta na-na) ta-na-na, yeah she got diamonds on the front of her cooze (a-wa a-wa) diamonds on the front of her cooze (a-wa a-wa)...

By: Alvy Ampersand

Alvy Ampersand — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:40:44 -0800

Meh, pretty unimpressive. My disco balls, on the other hand...

By: Flashman

Flashman — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:41:03 -0800

This is so awesome. I've always wished that the female crotch was festooned with shiny jewels rather than all that coarse, crinkly hair.

By: porn in the woods

porn in the woods — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:41:44 -0800

This looks like a tacky logical move for the Ed Hardy/hood rat crowd. Myself, I'll just dip my junk in glitter.

By: nonliteral

nonliteral — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 22:54:05 -0800

Why does this make me think of Sylvester McMonkey McBean, and his fabulous Star-On machine?

By: Clave

Clave — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:05:37 -0800

Seems like more than a few steps down from clit clips.

By: hattifattener

hattifattener — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:05:38 -0800

Of course they're Swarovski crystals. Yeesh. Jon_Evil already made the Paul Simon reference so I'll just link to this scene from The American Astronaut.

By: KokuRyu

KokuRyu — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:08:15 -0800

"WAHHHH, why do I get so much attention?!?!? Hey everybody, I put rhinestones on my pussy!"

By: Jon_Evil

Jon_Evil — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:16:10 -0800

I'll just link to this scene from The American Astronaut Man, I forgot about that movie! I can't remember if I loved it or hated it, though. But I had strong feelings.

By: nanojath

nanojath — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:16:19 -0800

I don't know why you would link to a rather dull article on the topic when the actual video is so much more surreal. Jennifer Love Hewitt wearing... something... (I'M BLIND ALL I CAN SEE IS STRIPPER BOOTS) delivering an obviously rehearsed spiel about this chapter in her book to an obviously cue-reading George Lopez who also looks as if someone took a airbrush full of bronzer mixed with Grecian Formula and styling gel to him, and this chapter she's talking about is all about the Topic at Hand, of course, except that I'm all like "fuck the topic, now Jennifer Love Hewitt has written a fucking book?" I mean seriously.

By: KokuRyu

KokuRyu — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:22:07 -0800

What do you do when a conventionally attractive woman wearing a miniskirt, sitting a foot or so from you announces she has affixed jewels to her groin? Do you imagine what it looks like? Do you sneak a look at her crotch, and if you do, is it allowed in this case? Or do you blank out the image in your mind? Hewitt is actually inviting you to visualize her crotch. It breaks a few rules and is a little unsettling.

By: stinkycheese

stinkycheese — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:32:40 -0800

Bring on the togas and slaves and gladiators! Bring on the giant tub of grease and that head-chopping machine!

By: idiopath

idiopath — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:33:21 -0800

"have you just glued a bunch of shiny things to your pubic area, or is the high refractive index in that general region a consequence of biologically produced fluids, and a signifier of how happy you are to see me?"

By: too bad you're not me

too bad you're not me — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:34:19 -0800

Is it supposed to be sexy? Guys, do you think it's sexy? Women, does this seem at all appealing to you? I'm proud to say my vagina and all surrounding areas are crystal-free. Go ahead and picture that if you like.

By: sexyrobot

sexyrobot — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:37:42 -0800

so...now it's "ribbed for his pleasure"?

By: ryanrs

ryanrs — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:37:54 -0800

What do you do when... The clever gentleman will profess disbelief.

By: Abiezer

Abiezer — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:39:51 -0800

The history of the practice is actually quite fascinating; many mistake the name as a play on words but in fact the term is originally Scandinavian, named after Vidkun Vajasling, the notorious WWII collaborator. He appeared at a rally in full Nazi regalia, sporting a chest full of unearned medals and became known throughout Northern Europe as "that twinkling twat."

By: TwelveTwo

TwelveTwo — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:44:11 -0800

Finally, the economy is turning around.

By: delmoi

delmoi — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:50:10 -0800

Man, why does google allow you to filter adult images but not allow you to filter everything that's not an adult image. Anyway, we don't really know what's going on in the actual vaginal area, we only see the pubic area in these pictures.

By: june made him a gemini

june made him a gemini — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:55:35 -0800

Well, there isn't much going on up top in either regards, so perhaps this is just what she needed to land that role in The Hills.

By: Kadin2048

Kadin2048 — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:57:48 -0800

Is it supposed to be sexy? Guys, do you think it's sexy? It strikes me as being very ... professional.

By: effugas

effugas — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:58:02 -0800

drugs rock and roll bad ass vegas halls late nights booty calls shiny disco ~~balls~~ vaj

By: nanojath

nanojath — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:58:27 -0800

we only see the pubic area in these pictures I'm going to go out on a limb and say they don't actually glue gems to the vulva. I'm proud to say my vagina and all surrounding areas are crystal-free. Go ahead and picture that if you like. Oh sure, and if I encouraged everyone to visualize my dick, like that would be okay? I'm calling reverse sexism on this trend.

By: chillmost

chillmost — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 00:00:28 -0800

This is really dumb.

By: ignignokt

ignignokt — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 00:09:51 -0800

OK, well, I thought it was going to about making a bunch of seventh chords and syncopated rhythms come out of a vagina via improvisation. So, this is actually less gross but more vapid.

By: koeselitz

koeselitz — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 00:14:33 -0800

nanojath: “I'm calling reverse sexism on this trend.” Er... well, as much as I disdain the 'trend' (is it? hm) of requesting that others visualize one's nether parts in general – given the related precedents, it would seem that 'reverse sexism' is a rather unfortunate coinage, no?

By: Blazecock Pileon

Blazecock Pileon — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 00:19:53 -0800

Finally, the economy is turning around. Turning around, bending over, and showing us its diamond-encrusted platinum pucker.

By: far from gormless

far from gormless — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 00:29:52 -0800

Grinding during sex deserves another definition if you're a vajazzler. I just don't see this leading to hot blinged out bangin', not with abrasive little grits acting as the world's best pubic exfoliant. Who needs a loofa when your partner has vajazzled!

By: Awakened

Awakened — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 00:45:16 -0800

Warning: May result in sparkle babies with vajazz hands.

By: poe

poe — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 00:51:33 -0800

I find this slightly hot. I would never ask anyone to do it for me, I don't need it, but if there was someone who decorated their junk for me I'd feel honored. Goodness knows I've put in and taken out piercings for the sake of a lover. I think a penis bedecked with edible make up might be more my speed, but honestly I will try anything twice. Some things I'll try over and over. So put me down as one vote for 'this is fun and sexy and goofy and doesn't weird me out at all'. (I'm a geeky bisexual man in San Francisco, for those wondering about the demographics.)

By: delmoi

delmoi — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 00:54:49 -0800

Actually I did find one pic on google image search where had actually stuck gems around the vulva (but I can't seem to find it any more)

By: alasdair

alasdair — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 01:03:50 -0800

Well, I was just discussing this week with someone how, to save the environment, we must move to a model of economic growth with decreased physical inputs (water, fuel, space) per unit of economic activity. And this kind of thing is how we do it!

By: HuronBob

HuronBob — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 01:06:09 -0800

so this is what happens here after midnight... I've been going to bed too early..... hot glue gun? Just asking....

By: the_royal_we

the_royal_we — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 01:08:20 -0800

Hey, Poe? I'm with you. I can't really think this is anything less than... kinda awesome.

By: louche mustachio

louche mustachio — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 01:11:30 -0800

I'll just link to this scene from The American Astronaut Man, I forgot about that movie! I can't remember if I loved it or hated it, though. But I had strong feelings. It was round and soft.

By: palmcorder_yajna

palmcorder_yajna — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 01:34:05 -0800

Far from gormless-- I was thinking the same thing. I wonder if, when you go in to have this done, you can ask for a particular grit size? Because sometimes you're in a delicate mood-- like maybe you only want to do a minor touch-up on an already-finished surface. But every now and again you wake up and you're like, "Well hell, might as well get the rust off that goddamn propane tank today."

By: Harald74

Harald74 — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 01:44:21 -0800

Are Swarovski crystals even jewels? As far as I can tell they are high-priced cut glass. Wikipedia seems to tell me that jewels have to be gemstones, and glass is not a gemstone. Or did I just misunderstand since I'm not a native English speaker? I'm just trying to figure out the exact amount of tacky they're going for here...

By: Ghidorah

Ghidorah — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 01:56:50 -0800

I don't usually respond to something I see on Metafilter like this, but: What the fuck is wrong with people?!

By: smoke

smoke — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 02:07:07 -0800

Well played, Abiezer. Very well played, sir.

By: june made him a gemini

june made him a gemini — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 02:10:41 -0800

Oh sure, and if I encouraged everyone to visualize my dick, like that would be okay? I'm calling reverse sexism on this trend. I think you missed the part where she was making fun of Jennifer Love Hewitt.

By: koeselitz

koeselitz — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 02:18:49 -0800

Jon_Evil: “Man, I forgot about that movie! I can't remember if I loved it or hated it, though. But I had strong feelings.” It's awful. So you probably hated it. They didn't even use the awesome Mekons song, and I know it wasn't a copyright thing because the Mekons don't fucking roll that way - they would've given their permission in a heartbeat. So first I was let down because I didn't get to listen to the Mekons, then I continued to be let down by the relentlessly cool steampunk vibe and lack of anything really interesting going on. Ah well. I'm a curmudgeon.

By: koeselitz

koeselitz — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 02:20:54 -0800

[Mekons, "Ghosts of American Astronauts"]

By: obiwanwasabi

obiwanwasabi — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 02:23:12 -0800

Next - the mons mosaic. "Why yes, my bush is Byzantine. Thanks for noticing!"

By: maxwelton

maxwelton — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 03:28:32 -0800

Next - the mons mosaic Actually, I'm expecting the typical 180-degree-veer from the previous generation's hang-ups, and we'll see it mandatory to have a bush you can lose a squirrel in. The hair club for mons, as it were.

By: longbaugh

longbaugh — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 03:38:38 -0800

Enamel Toe?

By: Forktine

Forktine — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 03:56:30 -0800

That looks to me like it would be quite uncomfortable during sex (unless you prefer your partner's pubis to be 80 grit, I suppose). But practicalities aside, and my intense dislike of the term "va-jay-jay" and all its derivatives aside as well, I'm all for people having more ways to decorate their bodies and have fun. This strikes me as being more like body paint, makeup, or costume jewelry -- things that are fun and pretty, without any permanence or much cost. If I found the stick-on "jewels" for sale cheap, I'd absolutely buy them and have a fun afternoon making pretty patterns on my partner. Decoration and costumes are fun.

By: piratebowling

piratebowling — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 04:25:44 -0800

I want to say this is just an updating of the Elizabeth Hurly sequinned pubic hair extensions rumor but honestly, who can tell anymore? Parody is dead, life is too absurd as it is.

By: saladin

saladin — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 04:27:30 -0800

I pass by that salon every day on my way to school. That entire block of Bond Street is an obnoxious paean to the more-money-than-sense lifestyle; witness, for instance, 40 Bond, with its huge aluminum gates "inspired by New York graffiti" that guard the $20 million apartments of inbred European fashion executives. That said executives have on-site access to vajazzling services is frankly unsurprising.

By: Metroid Baby

Metroid Baby — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 04:31:31 -0800

Clitter seems easier to apply. (NSFW. May result in sparkle babies.)

By: TheWhiteSkull

TheWhiteSkull — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 04:35:36 -0800

Bring on the togas and slaves and gladiators! Bring on the giant tub of grease and that head-chopping machine! I'm Hedonismbot and I aprOOOve of this message!

By: timeo danaos

timeo danaos — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 04:52:06 -0800

Okay, I'll ask. Why? It occurs to me that some women might do this to provide an alternative form of cover-up now that fur is no longer in fashion. The first time I got a look at myself after going completely bare, I know I was taken aback. If a patch of crotch glitter had been available to me at that moment, I might have slapped it on to replace my lost badge of sexual maturity.

By: pompomtom

pompomtom — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 05:10:54 -0800

May I suggest for anyone having this done to themselves, or, indeed, for anyone doing this to someone else: GET A FUCKING REAL JOB!!! DO SOMETHING OF VALUE IN YOUR LIFE!!

Thank you all for your time.

By: Kid Charlemagne

Kid Charlemagne — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 05:46:27 -0800

At least her desperate attempt to stay young doesn't involve shoving a sweet potato in there. Or cancer.

By: Horace Rumpole

Horace Rumpole — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 05:50:11 -0800

You certainly can't question her commitment to Sparkle Motion.

By: Clyde Mnestra

Clyde Mnestra — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 05:52:20 -0800

Diamonds are a girl's best pudend.

By: ROU_Xenophobe

ROU_Xenophobe — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 05:54:03 -0800

What do you do when a conventionally attractive woman wearing a miniskirt, sitting a foot or so from you announces she has affixed jewels to her groin? You immediately cease repairing her cable television.

By: wkearney99

wkearney99 — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 05:55:22 -0800

On one hand I'm tempted to believe this is an extraordinary hoax meant to whip the blogosphere up into it's usual frenzy. But then again, people never cease to amaze with their stupidity. Personally I'll take talent over spectacle. Plain with skills beats the hell out of a glittering array of sandpaper-like stones any day. Can you imagine the urologist that discovers one of those embedded somewhere painfully unpleasant? I believe the term 'face palm' doesn't even come close to expressing the rueful disappointment in their patient. But then again, it'd keep 'em employed, right?

By: drowsy

drowsy — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 06:25:05 -0800

I will never understand what makes swarovski so valuable. But it's fun to think of the occasions where these things will be frantically hunted down in the back seats and sofa cushions of those not wishing to kiss and tell, or lose something of great perceived value. Vajazzling: coming soon to a divorce deposition near you.

By: drowsy

drowsy — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 06:25:46 -0800

@Jon_Evil. sweet title btw.

By: kittens for breakfast

kittens for breakfast — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 06:37:31 -0800

My first thought was this was ridiculously, appallingly decadent, but you know...what makes it so different from piercings or tattoos? Other than it's not permanent and it's almost definitely cheaper. I think it could be very uncomfortable for her partner, however.

By: Ruthless Bunny

Ruthless Bunny — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 06:39:36 -0800

This broke my brain. I'm going back to the Daily Bunny.

By: explosion

explosion — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 06:45:32 -0800

my intense dislike of the term "va-jay-jay" and all its derivatives aside as well I like believing that the term is of Spanish origin, and thus is correctly pronounced "va-hey-hey", of course. Still stupid, but slightly more humorous, somehow.

By: TheWhiteSkull

TheWhiteSkull — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 06:45:55 -0800

You know, if I ever found myself in any kind of intimate situation with Jennifer Love Hewitt, and on sliding my hand into her underwear encountered Swarovski crystals, the first thing I would think is "what the fuck is this?" The second thing I would think is "how the hell did I find myself in an intimate situation with Jennifer Love Hewitt?" Also, aren't Swarovski crystals lead-based? Is that really the kind of thing you want adorning your vulva?

By: rocket88

rocket88 — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 06:46:37 -0800

At first I likened this to tattoos and piercings, so when I read the comments as if the topic *was* common tattoos and piercings, it made Metafilter seem like it was populated by sixty year old conservative prudes.

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 06:56:07 -0800

Okay, I'll ask. Why? I am a professional vajazzler. Let me address some of the questions in this thread: Nah I'm just fucking with you. But this comment should go in the sidebar anyway.

By: bibliowench

bibliowench — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 07:07:52 -0800

I think I'm going to make "I encourage everyone to visualize my dick" my new comeback of choice.

By: jonmc

jonmc — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 07:12:37 -0800

I assume assjazzling or jassling is next.

By: octobersurprise

octobersurprise — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 07:21:48 -0800

Technically it's Mons Pubazzling. Isn't that a famous Martian landmark?

By: pupdog

pupdog — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 07:22:37 -0800

Cloisonné - the only way to go from here...

By: HumanComplex

HumanComplex — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 07:31:05 -0800

I can't click on this because I'm at work, but visually speculating on what's on the other side of this post is disturbing me.

By: Daddy-O

Daddy-O — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 07:36:56 -0800

I will soon be opening a trade school to instruct the underemployed in the lucrative craft of vajazzling. Your student loan will be paid off in no time! Surely this is what Dr. Suess was thinking when he wrote Oh! The Places You'll Go.

By: Mister_A

Mister_A — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 07:37:01 -0800

I saw this on the TeeVee while running on the treadmill. The great thing about watching TeeVee while running on the treadmill is that you watch stuff you mightn't ordinarily.

By: Clyde Mnestra

Clyde Mnestra — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 07:43:50 -0800

This just in: next door to the vajazzler, a boutique specializing in merkin jewelry.

By: Halloween Jack

Halloween Jack — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 07:48:28 -0800

I think that this is stupid because it will inevitably end with the vajazzled one trying to explain why shiny glass beads are falling out of the bottom of her pants legs, but I say this as one who has contemplated the possibilities of using genital piercings as a place to hang amusing fridge magnets from.

By: Babblesort

Babblesort — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 08:01:31 -0800

I know less about this than you can possibly imagine.

By: FatherDagon

FatherDagon — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 08:11:49 -0800

Oh thank goodness, Fabergé Penis has a google search result. I was hoping that idea didn't exist only in the fetid basement of my mind.

By: ricochet biscuit

ricochet biscuit — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 08:21:11 -0800

Is it supposed to be sexy? Guys, do you think it's sexy? Coals to Newcastle.

By: i'm offended you're offended

i'm offended you're offended — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 08:31:01 -0800

I'm proud to say my vagina and all surrounding areas are crystal-free. Go ahead and picture that if you like. so ... are you doing anything tomorrow?

By: Wendy BD

Wendy BD — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 08:32:50 -0800

But how pretty will it be when the inevitable return of the natural forestation starts? (Also see: pubic hair dye, pubic hair stencils-eg:having the pubes waxed into the shape of a heart, little devil horns etc., anal bleaching and cosmetic surgery to have your vulva rejuvenated.)

By: desuetude

desuetude — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 08:34:45 -0800

So, you wax everything off to provide a smooth canvas for the mons-razzle-dazzle. So...what happens when the hair starts growing back? Ugh, what a mess that sounds like with crystals and stubble.

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 08:35:19 -0800

But how pretty will it be when the inevitable return of the natural forestation starts? I hadn't thought of this. You can't exactly wax/shave/whatever when you're covered in monsbling. I can only conclude that this trend is from the devilish minds of the people at the Nair corporation.

By: theora55

theora55 — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 08:40:46 -0800

I always snigger at the ultra-feminists who do workshops where they make clay vagina sculptures to show how much they love/accept their bodies. But. Now women are expected to shave, have surgery on, and now, bejewel their girly-bits? No. just No.

By: kurumi

kurumi — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 08:44:42 -0800

In 2011, we might see an article in Make magazine where you start with fifty LEDs (assorted colors) and a 330 uF capacitor.

By: Mister_A

Mister_A — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 08:47:44 -0800

Don't try to board a plane at Logan with that rig on, kurumi.

By: ROU_Xenophobe

ROU_Xenophobe — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 08:56:07 -0800

So...what happens when the hair starts growing back? Carousel.

By: OHenryPacey

OHenryPacey — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 09:31:18 -0800

I'm so stoked...i saw this a few weeks ago and bet several friends that vajazzle would enter the vernacular before this summer. To celebrate, i'm gonna indulge in some manscaping.

By: longbaugh

longbaugh — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 10:04:18 -0800

Okay I've got another one - Bejewelled Clitz. I'll get back to you as soon as I can. I'm doing the top ten for Letterman in another window.

By: Wilder

Wilder — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 10:06:02 -0800

Jesus here's some answers: it feels quite kinky actually, it's not grit-like at all, the profile is not high enough for them to rub in anything other than an interesting way against my partner's parts. For fun. No there is no stubble/gltizy bits because they tend to wash off over about a week in the shower, before the stubble comes in. Since they individually are so tiny, on the odd occasion they've come off on my smalls but they've never "fell out of" my trousers!! IANA a pro, I'm certainly not cheap, and I'm only trashy when I try really, really hard. And while not in the least surprised at the kinds of comment above I can't believe this is news, I first had it done in good old Dublin 5 years ago. I don't believe it's recent to NYC. I no longer do it as the daughter's College fees take every spare penny and the kinds of parties where it was a good idea have had to be rationed also. I recall is walking into the Hairy Lemon pub on Lower Mercer St at lunchtime only to be marched into the loo to be shown's Grainne's newest designs. Good times!

By: longbaugh

longbaugh — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 10:14:56 -0800

I do have to agree with several other straight up members (snicker) however. The vajayjay is already a sacred grove of wonder and happenis (rofl). As I get older I care less and less about making the lady-part into some sort of perfect thing. Surgery to fix excess labia, sparkling pubis, artistically trimmed pubic hair, assbleaching or whatever. It's all a waste of time. As a straight male who is sexually active, I'm pretty much all set to be going there anyway. Adding runway lights or a neon all-you-can-eat sign is going to make no difference to me whatsoever. Believe me, there really isn't a place I'd rather be*. *applies only to current partner unless cards have been played correctly and I have got two of a kind, if you smell what the rock is cooking...

By: jessamyn

jessamyn — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 10:22:08 -0800

Who gives a shit what other people do with their junk? I'm afraid I'm going to have to come down on the "let your freak flag fly, even if people think it's weird" bandwagon. Sorry team. But I do have to add this link, for the ladies and guy-loving guys. nsfw, natch.

By: idiopath

idiopath — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 10:27:25 -0800

jessamyn: "I do have to add this link" nyarlacock! Anything having to do with the genitals is just too easy to make light of, but yeah, whatever, let your freak flag fly, don't assume I judge in my jest.

By: sourwookie

sourwookie — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 11:18:30 -0800

Wait until Sarah Haskins gets ahold of this!

By: lord_wolf

lord_wolf — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 11:35:36 -0800

This thread has some of the funniest comments I've seen in a while. I think I might have worn out my mouse button adding favorites. But with that said, I gotta second those who are saying "Who gives a shit what other people do with their junk?" I'd be delighted by this if I were to discover it on my lover -- it strikes me as just a one-off fun and crazy thing to do. I would never, however, tell anyone they should do it or make it seem as though I expect it to be done. We only wear these shells once, and they're the only thing we truly own in this world (notwithstanding centuries of effort in some parts of the world to deny people -- particularly women -- ownership of their bodies.) So bling em out; paint them; ink them; pierce them; ne'er brandish scissors or blade against any hair; or stay smooth as a piece of quartz all over. Who cares? As long as it's your choice, have fun with it.

By: shakespeherian

shakespeherian — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 11:41:44 -0800

Who gives a shit what other people do with their junk? But it's the internet.

By: sexyrobot

sexyrobot — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 11:44:47 -0800

Crystal Cooter! Gemjina! Sparkle Pocket!

By: pianomover

pianomover — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 12:18:10 -0800

I only have two things to add, Eldridge Cleaver pants & dingleberries

By: TheNakedPixel

TheNakedPixel — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 12:50:32 -0800

That's my girl, Bryce! And I assure you that she's just as cool in person. This article's pictures were lifted from her article on The Luxury Spot.

By: MiltonRandKalman

MiltonRandKalman — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 12:57:38 -0800

I'll sit this fad out and wait till taint frescoes become fashionable.

By: Optimus Chyme

Optimus Chyme — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 13:08:04 -0800

they make female journalists do the dumbest shit hey guys remember when ted koppel showed us his weinis on nightline and it had a tattoo of the quayle-bentsen debate

By: djduckie

djduckie — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 13:27:02 -0800

and she was spinning like a disco ball girl Whoooooooaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa- David Garza

By: sexyrobot

sexyrobot — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 13:59:15 -0800

Twinkle Twat! Glamour Gulch! Snazzatch!

By: P.o.B.

P.o.B. — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 14:09:59 -0800

Vajazzling: The Video (Vajideo?)

By: kittens for breakfast

kittens for breakfast — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 15:08:44 -0800

they make female journalists do the dumbest shit Yeah, I dunno that Bryce Gruber is reaching for Edward R. Murrow status here. I don't know that I said this right above, but basically my initial thought was that this must cost an exorbitant amount of money, and was therefore sort of Caligula and gaudy. My initial thought was formed when I read, with no little interest, Jennifer Love Hewitt's comments in an article I saw a couple of weeks ago. But looking at it, this really seems to be costume jewelry, not a lot different from getting a henna tattoo or something, and I just don't see what the big deal is. It doesn't seem especially trashy, could be kinda cute (if one were so inclined!), though I'm not sure why you would want a sparkly approximation of pubic hair when, well, you could just have pubic hair. It's free!

By: supermedusa

supermedusa — Fri, 26 Feb 2010 21:18:55 -0800

this is highly silly but if I still went to burning man it would have to be considered....

By: Pirate-Bartender-Zombie-Monkey

Pirate-Bartender-Zombie-Monkey — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 15:31:04 -0800

First thought: New Marvel Comics movie franchise opportunity! Second thought: Damn, Disney bought Marvel. No chance now.

By: stammer

stammer — Sat, 27 Feb 2010 16:35:41 -0800

"Below the waist, though, it was the worst; for here all human resemblance left off and sheer phantasy began." -H. P. Lovecraft, The Dunwich Horror

By: b1tr0t

b1tr0t — Sun, 28 Feb 2010 09:15:45 -0800

William Gibson's response: Case considered the diamante sub-dermal implants studding her pubis. "Meh," he said.